T.F.J. #30 - Being a Proverbs 31 Woman vs. 23 - Married to a King

I had not originally planned to post a Faith Journey today, but our vacation was cut short due to power outages.  It was indeed a bummer, but I am grateful for a treasured time with my family, and we really enjoyed our "stay"cation once we returned back home.  I will be sharing more about our trip in the next few weeks.

"Her husband is respected at the city gate,

    where he takes his seat among the elders of the land." - Proverbs 31:23 (NIV)

When I first read this verse, I thought, Oh I should just skip this one.  What can I possibly say about it?  However as I prayed over it, a few thoughts came to mind for me to share.  Obviously from this verse, the Proverbs 31 woman is married to a man of great importance.  While the verse does not come right out and say it, I feel the focus still remains on the Proverbs 31 woman.

Reading this I am reminded of another biblical woman.  Her name is Hadassah but she is better known as Queen Esther and her story can be found in the book of Esther.  

If you are not familiar with her story, please take a few moments to go read it.  As it is truly fascinating.  

Returning to my thoughts on why this verse reminds me of Esther, she is a virtuous young woman whom strongly resembles that of the Proverbs 31 woman.  Esther was named queen when an arrogant and foolish Queen Vashti had the gall to publicly tell her husband, "no" when he summoned for her.  As a result she was striped of her royal name and it was given to Esther.  Queen Esther whom is best known for being the savior of the Jewish people, showed honor and respect to her husband through her actions.  There was a time when her actions may have been mistaken for disrespect, but her manner of doing it was such that her husband took great joy in her and rewarded her as a result.

So what does this have to do with us?  I am not married to a king, however I can still treat my husband as if he were one.  How would your treatment of your husband be different if he were the ruler of a country or a great noble man?  Would you be more respectful, more obedient, less of a nag?  I imagine that I would, at least publicly.  Do you often see the first lady or a princess trash her spouse?  Not usually.  What goes on behind closed doors may be another story, but to the public eye they give the picture of a perfect marriage, as well as their full support.  

Isn't that what marriage is about?  Shouldn't we always be giving our spouse our full support?  Shouldn't we be working to help them stay focused on their goals?  

What would you say if your husband came home and said, "honey, I have decided I want to be a missionary in Africa.  We are going to move the whole family there in just a few months."?  I believe most of us would say, "heck no..."

Is that wrong?  Yes!  Folks, we need to honor and respect our husbands.  Now granted he should be doing the same and hopefully there would be some prayer time as a family to see if this is the direction God is really leading you, but if there wasn't would you be able to respect his decision, to trust that he has your children and your best interests at heart and to support him fully?  I believe that for most women in this age of independent thinking, this concept is an extremely difficult pill to swallow.  

So for today lets start small.  Work on telling and showing your husband you love him daily.  Allow others to see the great respect and esteem in which you hold him.  Be supportive of his interest.  Encourage him to go play golf with his buddies or to watch a football game in peace.

If your marriage is not in a good place right now, you may find this extremely difficult.  Don't wait for him to start showing kindness to you.  Be the one to hold out the olive branch and begin working on your marriage by showing him a little love and kindness each and every day.  This whole journey is about baby steps.  You have to start somewhere. 

 Finally, be sure that you are praying...you should be praying for your spouse daily anyway.  We started that habit months ago, but make sure that you are continuing to do that.  Dependence on the Lord will make you a much stronger woman in the end.